If you are following KieryGeek and Humorotica I have an important note.

For reasons that involve creating safe places and also to get me to actually use more than one twitter account and figure out how to…multitask? or is it focus? something like that – if you get all your updates from @kiery28, or don’t get twitter updates about either project at all, but want them please go follow @kierygeek and @humoroticathulu.

I’m going to be using them more, more than once a week for Humorotica and more than once a month for KieryGeek. I’ll try to make it interesting and worth your while, I swear.

Thanks so much for helping me out <3

(also, if Facebook is more your style, KieryGeek and Humorotica currently share a space at KieryGeek: Rebooted. I know, I know, Humorotica should have it’s own page. One step at a time)

I have this familiar sense of needing to write – because all of the things happened – but not having enough coherent thoughts to put anything together. This happens a lot if I write infrequently, like I have been lately – lots of life happens in between posts and then I’m like, wait, what?

So here’s a brief listy-like update:

1: Humorotica has it’s own domain and new comics! And twitter (@humoroticathulu)

2. So does KieryGeek (and twitter @kierygeek)

3. I went and saw Aleka for a week and we went to a RenFaire and it was awesome.

4. While I was there, I CHOPPED OFF MY HAIR. And I think it looks awesome, and goes well with my new Gunnar’s glasses (Crystaline for drawing, yay!)

IMG_1828

I actually realized, today that the way my hair is cut is verrrrry similar to the way I draw my hair in my comics, which wasn’t intentional, but it feels very me and I’m happy about that.

5. KieryGeek 3.2 is out, about Guild Wars 2.

6. Crazy week. Thoughts. Things. Interesting. my brain is a blob right now.

7. Ni No Kuni, that is all.

I actually knew I was funded the day I left for PAX, but it kept going between feeling real and not feeling real yet. I was worried that everyone would take back their pledges last minute and I’d just be one of the many un-funded projects for reasons – like, I don’t know, the creative police coming to my door and being like, hey, no, you don’t get to do this, you CLEARLY don’t know what you’re doing and aren’t really creative anyway. And then they’d take all the money I didn’t have yet and give it to someone else; or pocket it….

But that didn’t happen, and as the seconds ticked away the total amount I made was $1,415. Perfect because when I got home from PAX our apartment roof had leaked and soaked our mic, so now I can afford to replace it with a better mic, which means better audio for everyone!

Anyway, now that the kickstarter is officially over and I don’t have it hanging over my head, I feel like I can actually think about the next steps. I tried, and I got as much as I could done, but it was really hard because it still felt so unsure.

I acquired an HD game recorder at PAX (because I’m married to a sweet person who fronted me the cash). I got the elgato Game Capture HD, and I can’t wait to try it out, because it’s supposed to be really awesome and the owner/creator of it that I talked to at the booth was really great and helpful and open about it and what it did and didn’t do (and is going to do, etc). Score!

While I waited today, I compiled all of the PAX footage, and also added in the promised twerking attempt. See below:

Not so long ago, I was one of those really unsocialized homeschoolers who couldn’t hold up a conversation about Harry Potter but could tell you about ANWR (Alaskan National Wildlife Refuge), domestic (oil) drilling, and how little control our federal government really has over the control of oil prices. I’d only ever played racing video games occasionally – my favorite games were the educational ones my parents bought or that my grandpa got from school – namely, Mavis Beacon Typing, Story Weaver, and Amazon Trail. Those were just the games I was allowed to play, actually. My brother played Need For Speed, and Lego Racers (which I joined in on a few times) and was allowed video games and consoles.

I lived in a very controlling, mentally/spiritually/emotionally abusive home, where I raised and nurtured 6 of my siblings until I moved out days before my 7th sibling was born at 18. I was never encouraged in any artistic endeavor or to do anything but get married and become a breeder for religious reasons. That’s what I got for being born with a uterus – my reproductive organs defined my worth.

I never read The Chronicles of Narnia, Lord of the Rings, or Harry Potter because magic was witchcraft, which we would inevitably start practicing if we were exposed to it (because of our lack of brains?). At one point we abandoned our Disney collection, until my mom had too many kids it was impractical to keep them from Cinderella even if it did have a fairy godmother in it, and she did use a spell (bippity, boppity, boo).

I thus immersed myself in historical fiction and studying history so intensely that I still have a lot of random stuff memorized. It was the only allowed form of geekiness that I had, and so, I used it. I had 4 pocket constitutions; for a couple years I always had one on hand, just in case. I knew where to find ANYTHING by the article, and often section number.

Because I was so intensely set on learning I saw through the bullshit that a lot of the history “teachers” in the Christian community were peddling. Their revisionist history – while I was never allowed to say otherwise without being lectured – was clearly ill informed, completely untrue, and lacking in any historical context. I knew this because I studied everything around and leading up to events just for the context.

Now when people try to tell me that we were meant to be a theocracy by our founders, I call bullshit and brainwashed.

That’s kind of besides the point, though. The point is that I was sheltered. I was not allowed to play actual video games for more than an hour here-or-there if my siblings needed a player 2. I wasn’t allowed to read fantasy books because of religion. I hadn’t seen Star Wars until I was nearly 17, and even then I was bored because it was Episode 1. I’m convinced we only saw it because my mom was confused about the “classic” nature of it, and the kid from Jingle All The Way was starring.

I didn’t see LOTR until I was 17 at my boyfriend’s house, because he was really into it: Tolkien quote in email signature and everything. We started with the extended edition – I had to watch it 3 different times before I got the story and then I fell in love with the genre and with LOTRTwo Towers especially.

When I moved out, and moved in with my boyfriend’s family which is an even longer story, we started playing the PC version of Halo on occasion. That was my first “real” introduction to gaming, even though I hated getting shot all the time while figuring out how to move. I was also introduced to Firefly and Fringe – we’d watch these quietly to avoid waking up his parents, who are also not into science fiction or fantasy.

When we got married, we bought our first console, cable, and I’ve come a long way since then. I’d always identified as a geek, much to my mom’s horror, because I always knew I was – so you can imagine my happiness upon finding not only a ton of content, but a ton of people who were into the same things. We discovered that Focus on the Family outright lied about Harry Potter; Doctor Who is amazing; Browncoats are forever; and GAMING IS FUN. There are games that have stories, you guys! STORIES, not just racing and/or shooting. I had found that piece of me that was missing and wanting to manifest, that piece of me that helps everything else make sense.

Ask any ex-quiverfull or fundamentalist daughter and they’ll tell you it’s reallllllly hard to escape the you-are-your-uterus-mindset and find out who you actually are, what you actually like. This has been a long process for me – an ongoing process even, because I’m still unlearning old thought processes. On bad days, I just sit and wonder if doing what I want is even worth it – if being me (whoever that is) is even worth it.

It is.

Now, I’m making the third season of my web-series. I started it last year in a moment of clarity, sudden bravery, and lack of fucks to give after an existential crisis.

This project, KieryGeek Season Three, is all about storytelling: the things that I love about gaming, sci-fi, fantasy, and geekdom – I’ll be talking about world-building in games and collecting play-through footage. I’ll also be creating stories with the help of my co-conspirator Matt (MALE FRIEND I’M NOT MARRIED TO WHAT? TAKE THAT UPBRINGING!) in a hangout format. I’d really like to see this funded not just because it’s cool and another kind of community, but because it would mean so much to me personally and my constantly self-critical psyche to do something amazing and worthwhile and completely me for a change.

Thank you everybody!

I’m 35% funded and it’s only been a week! Which is really awesome! I keep going between “I’ve got this” and panic – actually I made a comic about it, that you should check out. But here’s the thumbnail: kickstartercomic1It’s been kinda crazy – support’s been awesome. I’m looking for new ways to make people aware of the existence of the kickstarter and the awesome it entails. The hardest part is that, I have AWESOME things that I can’t announce until we’re closer to being funded, or are funded, so I’m like, anxiously impatient at the moment.

If you haven’t seen the kickstarter, you need to - check out the page and check out the project updates, because I’ve been making mini vlogs for them. Only two so far, but there will be more. If you like what you see, back it and share it with everyone you know.

I’ll be over here, plotting. and spamming sharing….